Archive for May, 2006
Tuesday, May 30th, 2006
One of the biggest challenges of achieving our goals is being able to stay focused long enough to see results. Most of us feel excited and motivated when we first set our goals, and that feeling can carry us along for several days, or even weeks. But then, what happens? We begin to lose momentum. We get scattered, we procrastinate, we lose the fire that once fueled our dreams. And we stop working so hard for what we want, even if we still want it.
There can be many reasons for our waning interest, such as not seeing visible progress as quickly as we’d like, so we begin to feel that our efforts are a waste of time. Or we lose sight of what we were working so hard for. Or we feel confused about the steps we need to take to make our dream a reality.
Since this is a common problem for many people, I’m going to offer some helpful tips to re-fuel your fire:
1) Be clear about what you want. When we first set our goals, we know exactly what we want. We have a clear picture of the outcome in our minds, and we usually know exactly how to make it happen. But once the initial excitement wears off, we might lose that clear vision and get confused. We start thinking that maybe that goal isn’t achievable after all, and maybe we should aim for something smaller, or change course altogether. To stop this from happening, write out your goal in minute detail! Write about the ways it will improve your life and make you feel more fulfilled. Then make sure to read this description every single day. Even more than once a day, if you need to. Keep that vision STRONG in your mind.
2) Be clear about why you want it. The subconscious mind can be sneaky with the messages it sends us, and we might think we want something, when in fact we really want something else entirely. How can we tell what is going on beneath the surface? An excellent way to gain insight on this is to write out the question, “I want (insert your goal) because it will . . .,” and write exactly what it will do for you. How it will make you feel. And then keep following up with questions that go deeper into what you really want. For example, let’s say I wanted to lose 20 pounds. I would write, “I want to lose 20 pounds because it will make me feel better about myself.” Following that answer, my next question would be, “Why do I want to feel better about myself?” So I would write, “I want to feel better about myself because I will be a happier person.” Ah, so my TRUE goal is to be a happier person. Can I do that without losing 20 pounds? Of course. But the key isn’t to talk ourselves out of our goals, it’s to understand what our TRUE goals really are. Because once we understand what we really want, we will be much more focused in our efforts to achieve it.
3) Set a plan of action. How do we get to where we want to be? By defining the action steps that will get us there. This part is actually really simple. Most of us are great at planning, but not so great at taking the actions! 
But I do want to point out one thing here. Remember Step #2 above, my goal is to lose 20 pounds, but it’s also to be a happier person. How can I do those things? Obviously, eating a balanced diet and exercising will help me shed the 20 pounds, but I also need to work on my mental and emotional state on a daily basis, in order to become a happier person. Just losing 20 pounds will not automatically make me a happier person. So included in my action steps should be positive thinking techniques that will make me feel happier, such as affirmations, meditation, positive self-talk, etc. Our action steps need to be VERY detailed. In fact, with most goals, we can come up with daily action steps, weekly action steps, and monthly action steps that will keep us on the right track. Think about the outcome you’re trying to create, and then think about each step you will need to make it a reality.
4) Organize, review, re-organize again, and repeat. One mistake many of us make is that we set our plans and call it good. But plans need to be revised every so often to keep them fresh and relevant. Once you have your action plan set, perform a DAILY review of it to be sure you are still working toward your goals, and that your goals haven’t changed since you first made your plans. Remember that our lives are not stagnant; they are always shifting and changing, as are we. So make it a daily practice to review, re-organize (if necessary), and you will be sure you are always moving forward decisively. You can do this first thing in the morning before you start your day, or in the evening before you retire so you are clear about your plans for the following day.
5) Act like it’s already your reality. Finally, one of the most powerful things we can do is to act like we already have what we are trying to create. Using the example above, I would act like I weighed 20 pounds less, and I would act like I was already happy. Yes, this can be challenging to do, especially when your eyes are telling you an opposite “truth.” But remember that the creation process begins in the MIND. If your mind is constantly telling you that you’re fat and unhappy, guess what happens? You will believe it. If, on the other hand, you keep telling yourself that you are fit and happy, you will begin to really feel that way, and you will begin to attract that result to yourself. It takes time though. Remember that your circumstances today are a direct result of your past thoughts and beliefs, which direct your actions, which creates a certain result. If you start thinking and acting in a different way today, you will create different results tomorrow.
Wendy
CreationThoughts.com
WingsfortheHeart.com
VisualizeProsperityBook.com
Posted in Goals & Dreams | No Comments »
Monday, May 22nd, 2006
When we first decide to make positive changes in our lives, we usually underestimate the amount of effort it will take. It’s easy to dream and imagine a better life, but we also need to give form to our thoughts with decisive action. And that’s where most of us get stuck.
Imagine that you wanted to build a house, and think about the process that needs to be put into place. You’d need to conceive the idea, buy land, draw up plans, order materials, hire professionals to do the tasks you can’t, and finally, begin building the house. If you got as far as purchasing the materials and then sat there waiting for them to magically form themselves into a house, you’d be waiting a long time!
We need to use the same process to “build” the lives we want. We need to be clear on what we want (conceive the idea), draw up plans (set goals), and then take action to form our desires in the physical.
What most of us do, however, is say we want to change, but then act in ways that contradict that desire. There can be many reasons for this, such as the lure of old habits, fear, or low self-worth. Until we resolve the underlying issues, we will keep sabotaging our efforts to change.
If this describes you, and you’ve been struggling to make positive changes in your life and you just can’t seem to do it, here is a 3-step plan to help you break through any walls that may be holding you back:
1) Identify and remove blockages. If you consistently avoid taking the actions that will bring about positive change in your life, there is likely something holding you back. It may be an old belief that you’re not worthy of a happy life, or fear that you won’t be able to handle the new circumstances, or just plain old resistance to change.
If you take some time to explore these feelings, you will be able to work through any limiting beliefs or fears. In fact, don’t be surprised if you discover something about yourself that you never knew existed. You can explore your feelings by either writing them out, or speaking them aloud. You might start off with a prompt such as, “I feel afraid of . . .” or “I feel safe with my life the way it is because . . .” Allow your answers to come freely, and work on changing any thoughts or beliefs that will continue to hold you back.
2) Form decisive action steps. Another reason you might resist change is feeling unsure about the actions you need to take to bring it about. If you make a list of very specific steps that you can take daily, you will have a clear roadmap to the outcome you are trying to create. Think about the outcome, and then decide exactly which actions will bring you closer to it. Write them down and review them several times a day to be sure you are on the right track.
3) Make the right decisions. Adapting to change requires consistent decision-making. When you decide to quit smoking, you don’t make that decision just once and be done with it. You need to make that decision over and over again as the cravings arise, until you no longer desire to smoke. If you decide to exercise every day, you will need to make that decision again each day, day after day, week after week - even if you don’t feel like exercising initially. The same process applies to any changes you are trying to make in your life. Moment to moment, you need to choose the actions that will result in what you are trying to create. In order to do this, you may need to develop a deeper level of awareness about your own actions, especially if you find yourself automatically gravitating toward unproductive actions.
Remember that improvement is a process, and it takes consistent effort and focus. The good news is that once we begin the process, it gets easier every time we choose the right actions. Moment to moment, we do have the power to choose. If we take our time and enjoy the journey, we can’t fail.
Wendy
CreationThoughts.com
WingsfortheHeart.com
VisualizeProsperityBook.com
Posted in Intentions, Law of Attraction | No Comments »
Wednesday, May 17th, 2006
One of the best ways to gain clarity about your life is by journaling your thoughts and feelings. Especially if you’re feeling conflicted or confused about certain situations, writing your thoughts out can be incredibly enlightening!
You don’t have to be a “writer” to journal effectively. In fact, your writing skills don’t have to be good at all. Just the act of putting your thoughts into logical order and translating them to written form can help you to understand what you’re feeling, and why.
Here are some tips to help you use journaling for personal growth:
1) Keep it simple. You don’t need to spend a lot of money on a fancy journal. In fact, unless you’re an experienced journaler, I recommend using an inexpensive, lined notebook. Then you won’t feel so much pressure to be “perfect” in what you write. You won’t be afraid to scribble and scrawl whatever happens to flow onto the paper.
2) Don’t hold back. When you journal for the purposes of personal growth, don’t try to edit yourself, or make your writing understandable to anyone else. The most freeing technique is to put your pen to paper and just write whatever comes to mind. No one else will see it unless you want them to, so let ‘er rip!
3) Focus on the feelings. If you find yourself stumped about what to write in your journal, begin with the phrase, “I feel…”. This will usually get your thoughts and feelings flowing, and you will be better able to express them in writing.
4) Guided journaling. Another helpful technique is guided journaling, which means providing a prompt for yourself. Especially if you’re struggling with something specific, you can more easily get the words flowing with a nudge in the right direction. Some example prompts would be, “Describe your perfect career and the reasons it would fulfill you.” Or, “Think about the most painful experience in your past and write about the ways it has affected who you are today.”
5) Review your entries periodically. Going back to look at your journal entries can be very illuminating and provide amazing clarity about yourself. With time and practice, you will likely begin to see patterns in your thinking, behaviors, and beliefs. The most important thing is to keep an objective mindset while you look at your entries. Don’t judge or belittle yourself. Keep the focus on personal growth and development. Instead of beating yourself up or cringing over your latest rant, ask yourself, “How can I use this knowledge to improve my circumstances now?”
If you’re not a natural writer, journaling may seem like a lot of effort at first. But it is so worth it! Because I am a writer, journaling is something I’ve always done. As a child, I kept written diaries that focused more on my day to day experiences. Dear Diary, today a cute boy smiled at me and I melted! LOL 
In my twenties, I decided I wanted to understand myself better, so I began keeping written journals with a focus on self-discovery. That practice has paid off in amazing ways over the past decade or so.
You can also keep journals for other reasons besides personal growth. For example, you can begin a gratitude journal to jot down a few things you are thankful for each day, which will help you to feel more positive about your life. You can keep a spiritual growth journal to record prayers and meditations that were effective for you. You can keep a dream journal to learn more about the messages your dreams hold. The possibilities are endless!
If you really don’t like writing with pen and paper, you can also keep an online journal in the form of a blog. There are many providers that offer free membership accounts, with easy-to-use interfaces. Two popular choices are Blogger.com and LiveJournal.com. However, if you keep an online journal, you might want to make it private so no one else can view it. It’s amazing what search engines can find nowadays, and you don’t want your neighbor or employer coming across your private thoughts. Most blog hosts allow an option to keep your blog non-viewable to the public. Or you can simply stay anonymous with your blog, but allow others to read it. Use a pseudonym and don’t give any identifiable information about yourself.
Finally, don’t feel that you have to follow any set rules with your journaling. Do what works best for you, and enjoy the journey!
Wendy
CreationThoughts.com
WingsfortheHeart.com
VisualizeProsperityBook.com
Posted in Personal Development | No Comments »
Tuesday, May 16th, 2006
One of my favorite television characters ever was Phoebe Buffay from Friends (played by Lisa Kudrow). She was quirky, feisty, and sometimes downright weird. But she was never afraid to be herself, even though her friends were obviously very different in personality.
How many of us have the courage to do this? I think many of us tend to try to blend in with our friends, rather than stand out. In fact, society in general makes it clear that certain traits are considered acceptable, while others aren’t. If we dare to break from the “norm” and express a unique part of our personality, we get the raised eyebrow — or worse.
But aren’t we cheating others and ourselves by doing that? I happen to believe that each of us is here on this earth for a specific purpose. We have each been given special gifts and traits that no one else has, and we are supposed to be using them in our daily experiences. If we hide these parts of ourselves, we are denying their existence, which is the same thing as refusing a gift.
Even worse, if we are not genuinely ourselves, we end up attracting the wrong people into our lives. While living an illusion, we attract people who buy into our illusion, not us. No valuable connections can be made. We also end up attracting others who are living an illusion, and we end up being two empty illusions trying to create something meaningful. It won’t work.
More than 15 years ago, I decided to stop living an illusion and make an effort to be myself as often as possible. The result was painful in some ways. People that I thought were my friends ended being anything but. In fact, most of the people I associated with at that time abandoned me. Some ties I cut myself. Yes, it hurt. But at the same time, I realized that the “purging” was necessary in order to make room for more genuine relationships. I enjoyed a few years of solitude which I devoted mostly to personal development. I knew I needed to get to know myself fully before anyone else could.
And it paid off in so many ways. I have true friends now. Friends that know my quirks, and love me despite them. Even some friends that are kind of quirky themselves. Interestingly, I have LESS friends now than I did years ago. But they are better friends than the old ones were. I’ve chosen quality over quantity this time around. My friends really “get” me most of the time, and I’m okay with it when they don’t.
I learned something important from this experience. We don’t all have to be the same. In fact, it’s better if we’re NOT. What a boring world it would be if we were identical in our personalities, likes, dislikes, beliefs, and convictions. While it’s usually good to have similarities so we have something in common, we can also learn to celebrate that which makes us different. Different is good. Different is interesting. Different is meaningful.
Thanks Phoebe, for the reminder.
Wendy
CreationThoughts.com
WingsfortheHeart.com
VisualizeProsperityBook.com
Posted in Personal Development, Self-Love | No Comments »
Friday, May 12th, 2006
I find it interesting when people seek something for nothing. No, I’m not referring to free product samples of shampoo, or appetizer samples handed out freely in the grocery store aisles.
I’m referring to people who purposely try to get a valuable service or product…without paying for it.
Maybe because your neighbor is a hair stylist, you begin going to her salon because you think she might cut your hair free of charge. Or your coworker is an artist and you ask her to do a portrait for your parent’s anniversary, expecting a large discount (or even freebie). Or you meet a lawyer at a party and begin soliciting free legal advice. Or an acquaintance is a tarot reader and you contact her to ask for advice, hoping she’ll offer a free reading.
What’s the problem with these situations? You are expecting something for nothing.
Money is a form of energy, just like everything else in our world. And with all forms of energy, there needs to be a balance in some way. By trying to get these products/services for free, you are in essence telling the universe that they are not worth paying for. When you don’t see value in something, you will receive nothing valuable from it.
I’m not referring to someone being truly in need of help. I’m referring to those who can pay, but choose not to.
Just like that old saying, “you get what you pay for.” — You also get back what you put out into the universe. If you give nothing, you will likely get nothing in return. Even if you do recieve products and services for free, they will mean nothing to you. You won’t appreciate them. They won’t add anything of value to your life.
Here’s how to keep positive energy flowing in your life. Be generous. Be giving. Be kind and compassionate. Give of yourself as often as possible. Expect to pay for anything of value, pay well for it, and pay gladly. Respect the time and expertise of those who can provide a product or service for you. Understand that their time and attention has value. Be glad that you can exchange money for something you perceive to have value.
If someone gladly OFFERS a freebie, certainly you can take advantage of it. But don’t expect it. Don’t seek it.
Let the energy of abundance come into your life, AND flow out in equal measure. That is a true blessing.
Wendy
CreationThoughts.com
WingsfortheHeart.com
VisualizeProsperityBook.com
Posted in Prosperity & Abundance | No Comments »
Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
I received such a funny email this week, from a nice man in Minnesota who wishes to remain anonymous. This is all his email said:
“Are you ALWAYS so upbeat and happy? You drive me nuts sometimes.”
Yes sir, I do drive a lot of people nuts. It’s one of my gifts.
But seriously, he does bring up a good point that I want to cover this week.
Because of the type of writing I do, you may think that I have a perfect life. You may imagine me wearing a flowing, romantic gown as I glide through my abundant private gardens, pausing to smell the roses occasionally, and reflecting on the deeper meaning of life.
Yes, I do that, but only on Wednesdays. *grin*
The rest of the time, I am feeling my way through this grand adventure we call Life, just like everyone else.
I have bad days. I get cranky without enough sleep, and I drink too much coffee to make up for it. I get impatient when my husband leaves his socks on the floor after I’ve asked him to pick them up for the millionth time. I get caught in traffic jams, deal with rude people, and feel exasperated when things don’t go according to plan. I’m just like you!
But I also choose to look on the bright side as often as I can. Why? Because it makes me feel happier. And that is why I write so much about positive thinking, optimism, and the other motivational topics I cover. I want you to feel happier too.
I fear that I have given the impression that being optimistic means that we won’t ever have challenges to overcome, or obstacles to get through; that our lives will become beautiful expressions of divine purpose if we can just get our thoughts in order. It’s just not true.
The greatest secret of life is learning how to love each moment despite our challenges.
It’s learning to cherish the good times, and push determinedly through the rough patches.
It’s learning to overcome pessimism and doubt, and focus on joy and faith.
I truly believe that we attract the types of experiences we have according to the types of thoughts we focus on the most.
But let’s put that aside and instead think about it this way: it just FEELS better to be happy and optimistic, rather than angry and pessimistic. Doesn’t it?
Think about the best day you’ve ever had, and the worst day you can remember. Then compare how you felt on each day. Which would you choose if you had to set a theme for your life?
In the end, it’s all about choices. Just like we can choose which clothing to wear each day, we can choose our mood and attitude. We can choose whether to create a life of joy, or a life of sorrow. It’s up to us, moment to moment.
I hope that helps clear the air a little bit, sir! No, I’m not “always” upbeat and happy. But most of the time, I do choose to be.
Blessings and love to you all!
Wendy
CreationThoughts.com
WingsfortheHeart.com
VisualizeProsperityBook.com
Posted in Positive Thinking | No Comments »
