Creation Thoughts

How do you stay positive?

It can be challenging for sure! In recent years I’ve made a lot of progress in turning my attention away from negative trends and keeping a more positive focus as much as possible.

I don’t watch the news unless I feel there’s something important I need to know. Usually I just scan the headlines online and read only selected stories. I avoid getting tangled in conflict or arguments - or even reading heated discussions online. I work hard each day to feed my mind with positive thoughts, and share many of my own on my various websites, articles and blog(s).

Despite that positive focus, I still get blindsided by negativity pretty often. How? From the people in my life! Don’t get me wrong, I’m blessed with a wonderful circle of family and friends. They’re all great people in their own ways, but they also have their little quirks.

Take my husband, for example. Sometimes I think he should have been named “Negative Ned” - actually his name is Patrick, so let’s use “Pessimistic Patrick” instead. This is a guy who has a lot going for him. He’s attractive, intelligent, funny and has a great job (not to mention his gorgeous, charming wife, hehe). But he’s always obsessed with the negative possibilities in life.

If I mention doing some improvements to our house, he launches into a discussion about how the housing market is the worst it’s been in decades, and we’ll probably end up losing all our equity anyway, so there’s not much point.

If I talk about something we’ll do in the future, he casually mentions that the Mayan Calendar ends in 2012, so don’t plan on being here after that. (I wish I was kidding! LOL :-))

I could go on and on with him because he comes out with some doozies! But let’s share the love with someone else. My mother also lives with us, and she trolls the television news stations 3 times a day in search of the latest disasters. If she does happen to find one (and she usually does!), she’ll pop her head into my office to give me the rundown: “A tractor trailer truck just rolled over on I-95 and crushed a few cars - it looks like several people were killed. You should come see this.” (Do I really WANT to see that?) “They’re saying a big storm is heading our way and we could end up with a lot of ice buildup on the trees. I hope they don’t crash down on the house.” (Gee, me too Mom - but thanks for lending some energy to the possibility!)  ”Wendy, a gunman just took a dog hostage in Minnesota. It’s not looking good for the dog . . .” (Okay, I’m exaggerating a wee bit on that last one, but you get the idea.)

I love these people, but sometimes I wish I had a mute button!

I’m willing to bet you’ve got similar challenges in trying to stay positive too, right? How do you tune out the negativity of others and avoid letting it drag down YOUR energy?

I think one of the most effective techniques I’ve found to deal with situations like these is to utter one word to myself when they start with the negative stuff: PERCEPTION.

I remind myself that they are sharing a perception with me - which doesn’t have to become MY perception. Then I try to shift my focus to a more positive perception to balance it out. It’s not easy sometimes, but you’d be amazed at what you can do if you set your mind to it.

When it comes right down to it, it’s impossible to completely avoid negativity.  And I don’t think it’s necessary anyway. If you’re focusing the majority of your energy and attention on more positive thoughts and keeping your emotions aligned as much as you can, then you’re way ahead of the game!

You can’t force anyone else to be more positive; you can only control your own focus.  If other people constantly focus on the negative and it disturbs you, step away from them for awhile.  Go do something that makes you feel good.  Or mentally “cancel” out their negative comments and replace them with positive thoughts inside your own head.

It doesn’t matter how you choose to deal with it, as long as you don’t let the negativity take over your own mind-set.  Who knows, maybe your own positive outlook will begin to rub off on the people around you!  That’s my hope for my own family - and if not, there’s always earplugs. 

Wendy
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